Back to the Future: Soul Friends in Community

Copyright: South Bay Community Church
Sermon Reflections: Back to the Future: Soul Friends
Date: 28 January 2024
Speaker: Minister Doug Ericsson
Sermon Text: Hebrews 10:24-25
Sermon Preamble
            We are continuing our mini-series, “Back to the Future,” with the idea that sometimes we must go back in order to go forward. God’s basics are a firm foundation that we must revisit wherever God is leading us in the future. In this message, we are looking at Soul Friends in Community. When we think of friendship we think of hanging out together, enjoying someone you know well and whose company you appreciate. Friends share mutual affection and intimacy usually based on shared interests. It generally involves two people who trust each other. What is distinct about a soul friend? A soul friend is a kind of friendship that is centered around concern for one another’s soul – that is, who we are in the depth of our being, the real person we are on the inside. To be a soul friend is to meet each other as the unique individual we are before God, as the whole person that we are, not just our outward presentation. A "Soul Friend" relationship is based upon our personal connection with Jesus Christ. Jesus is at the center of a soul friendship under the leadership of the Word of God and the Holy Spirit. This friendship seeks to help each other live fully in Christ. Supporting each other’s life in Christ is the goal of soul friends. Christ alone is our salvation; Jesus Christ is our justification, so we no longer seek to justify ourselves. This surrender of our own power, ability, and goodness to be right with God and others is how we come to faith. It is how we continue in our walk. It is also how we engage with our Christian brethren. God’s intent from the very beginning is that we live in community. Just as when God created humanity through Adam and Eve, God said, “It is not good to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). Beyond marriage, we need soul friends in the community of faith.

Believers meet to motivate and encourage one another to acts of love and good works 
            “24Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. 25And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of His return is drawing near” (Hebrews 10:24-25). The book of Hebrews addresses the superiority of Christ over all other means of approaching God; His sacrifice is complete; we have a new way of living; we are no longer living under the old covenant Law; we no longer are striving to be the best we can, worrying about each of our offenses. The slate is wiped clean; Christ is our salvation; we no long seek to justify ourselves; He is our justification. This surrender of our own power, ability, and goodness to be right with God and others is how we come to faith. It is how we continue in our walk. It is also how we engage with our Christian brothers and sisters.
            In Hebrews 10:24 we are directed to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. The Message Translation says, “Let us see how inventive we can be in encouraging love and helping out toward the end of love and good works.”
            In Hebrews 10:25, we are directed to not neglect meeting together, but encourage one another. Why might someone neglect meeting together? In biblical days, there was persecution and danger for proclamations of Christ. (See Hebrews 10:32–34).  Unlike many places in the world, this is not the pressure we face in the United States. Rather, our struggle today tends to be with laziness or self-sufficiency; we presume we’re OK on our own.  We may choose other pleasures.  There are so many shiny things in our world to distract us. We can become isolated by our personal troubles. We may feel sad, disappointed, anxious, or lonely. We may give in to lust when we want to escape. We may get angry, fearful, or lose our temper and think that we’re not worthy in the fellowship of Christ. Whatever our hurdle, we are strongly urged not to withdraw from fellowship with soul friends.
            We need one another to live out our life in Jesus Christ. This is more than just attending Church or participating in worship. To sustain our faith and grow as believers, close fellowship with others is essential. Without good fellowship with other believers, the world, the Devil, and the pride of life will squeeze the life with Christ out of us. We’ll be like the seed in the parable of the Sower (See Mark 4:1-20). Once the seed is sown, the growth of the plant is stymied in several ways - squeezed out by the weeds, burn up by the sun, choked out by the cares of the world. Assembling with other believers is an important part of a healthy, growing Christian life.

We need soul friends in community because we are not meant to be alone
            God’s intent from the very beginning is that we live in community. God’s personhood lives in community. Within the Godhead is community: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. We are made in the image of God (Genesis 1:26-27). Humanity also needs community.
            “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” (Genesis 2:18). When God created humanity, God observed that Adam was all alone and declared that it is not good. Adam needed a partner to complement him; to share the gifts of the garden and all of life, to be intimate with, to commune with, and to explore the world alongside. The reality that brought Eve to Adam to complete him is continually true for all of humanity over the centuries. Beyond marriage, we need each other in the community of faith. It is not good to be alone.

Support helps – Two are better than one alone
            “9Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. 10If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. 11Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? 12A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple braided cord is not easily broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12). There are many dangers in life; we need to help each other succeed; we have support when we fail. There is much to celebrate; we need to share. There is much to learn; we need someone to challenge us. There is much to overcome; we need help persevering to stay on course; we can then withstand attacks better from the Devil, from self-doubt, and from life challenges.  It is apparent we need each other.
            Soul friendship is not based upon people with different levels of piety, religious maturity, or spiritual commitment. Jesus wants believers of different levels to come together at the foot of His Cross to listen to Him, follow Him and experience His love, mercy, guidance and forgiveness.
            We share family life with God and with one another. 1st John 2:9 let us know that our fellowship with God and our fellowship with one another are reflections of each other.

The help of encouragement from others is guided by the Word of God and the Holy Spirit 
            Sometimes it takes only one word, a smile, or a grasp of the hand to encourage someone who is experiencing a trial. Sometimes it means standing by someone during a particularly hard time and helping him or her not give in to despair. It feels especially good to know you’re loved in those low moments when you cannot see clearly ahead or when you don’t understand God’s perspective and vision for your life. When we are encouraged in Christ, we have strength to put on our spiritual armor and remain steadfast.
            Without encouragement, hardship becomes meaningless, and our will to go on wanes. Without encouragement, life would soon feel pointless and burdensome. Without encouragement, we can be overwhelmed by the very real pains of our lives. Without encouragement, we feel unloved. Without encouragement, we begin to think that God is a liar or is unconcerned with our welfare. So, the Bible tells us to encourage one another, to remind each other of the truth that God loves us, God equips us, that we are treasured, and that our struggles are worth it.
            Encouragement from the Word of God in the Bible gives us the will to carry on. It is a glimpse of the bigger picture. It can prevent burn-out. It can save us from believing lies.

Correction without judgment
            The intimate connection of a soul friend allows protection from slipping into sin. Without anyone there to help you, one can easily wander away from God. Correcting a fellow believer is a delicate matter. Galatians 6:1 gives good guidance here. “Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are led by the Spirit should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.” (Galatians 6:1). We are to help a person back on the right path. We are not to judge or criticize. Our approach needs to be gentle and humble.  We need to be cautious recognizing our own vulnerability to sin; not being puffed up or  thinking we have it all together. Walking the godly path can guard us from harsh correction. With a caring approach a soul friend may help restore another’s walk with the LORD. We all need help with our proneness to wander.

Accountability with a soul friend
            Sharing our burdens with one another enables us to hold each other accountable. Not isolating oneself but being open and transparent about our lives with an intimate friend keeps us from losing our way.

Sharing in celebration and weeping
            “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:16). We rejoice together and weep together knowing the goodness of Christ our LORD who forgives our sin, cleanses us from all unrighteousness, and gives us our glorious salvation.

Any endeavor in which we want to grow requires key elements similar to a soul friend
A soul friend is like a spotter at the gymnasium
            Like a spotter, your soul friend helps judge the best weight to lift. Your soul friend knows you and your routine. Your soul friend is alongside of you as you lift to keep you safe. Your soul friend celebrates your successes. Your soul friend encourages sustained effort to grow and embrace your challenges.
A soul friend is like a weight loss coach at the gymnasium
            Your soul friend provides you accountability, guidance, understanding, encouragement, and to face reality. Your soul friend is like a coach committed to your growth. Your growth requires a teacher.
A soul friend is like a wingman in social situations
            Your soul friend helps with courage. Your soul friend introduces you to new people. Your soul friend helps you overcome shyness. Your soul friend helps you evaluate how it went. Your soul friend helps you stay in social situations. Your soul friend helps you to connect deeply and be real. This includes your weaknesses, blind spots, and places where apathy or fear blocks you. A soul friend, guided by God through the Word of God and the Holy Spirit, helps you be open to correction and acknowledging your shortcomings and mistakes. Your soul friend also celebrates your improvement with you.
A soul friend is like your confidant to walk together
            Your soul friend is one to whom you entrust secrets, especially intimate secrets. Your soul friend is a person you trust and with whom you share your feelings. Your soul friend is a person with whom you share  secrets or private matters, trusting them not to repeat to others, and with the utmost confidentiality.
 
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS INCLUDING FAMILY GROUPS
Sermon Preamble
-Do you have someone who walks alongside you on your spiritual journey?
Believers meet to motivate and encourage one another to acts of love and good works 
-How do you and a soul friend encourage each other towards love and good works or deeds?
We need soul friends in community because we are not meant to be alone
-Why do you need a soul friend in the community of faith?
Support helps – Two are better than one alone
-When do you see that soul friends are better than being alone?
The help of encouragement from others is guided by the Word of God and the Holy Spirit 
-In what ways can you help by offering encouragement to your soul friend or other believers in Christ?
-When have you used the foundations of the guidance from the biblical Word of God and the Holy Spirit to offer encouragement?
Correction without judgement
-When we are led by the Word of God and the Spirit of God, how must a soul friend conduct themselves?
Accountability with a soul friend 
-How does your spiritual journey grow with your soul friend?
Sharing in celebration and weeping
-In what circumstances have you wanted to share rejoicing within the community of faith?
Any endeavor in which we want to grow requires key elements similar to a soul friend
-When have you shared with another believer or soul friend your concerns?

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