The Gift of Darkness: Doubt and Deconstruction

Copyright: South Bay Community Church
Sermon Reflections: Doubt & Deconstruction
Date: 04 June 2023
  Speakers: Pastor Tammy Long
Scripture Text: Hebrews 11:5, Mark 9:24
Sermon Preamble
 In this message, we close our sermon series on the Gift of Darkness, by exploring the darkness of doubt and deconstructing our faith. Doubt is honestly asking tough questions. In deconstruction of faith, we are examining and evaluating what we believe. This can lead to reevaluating and dismantling faith. So far in this sermon series, we have considered the darkness of what appears for us to be God’s absence, the darkness of illness and physical challenges that God has not healed on earth, the darkness of trauma, and the darkness of God’s silence. We saw how there are unique gifts in every season of darkness. Light and darkness are the same to God, and God does some of God’s best work in the dark. Every area of darkness we have looked at so far has been about when we feel God has turned away from us. In this message, we will explore the darkness of doubt and deconstruction when we step back and sometimes even step away from God.  We may find ourselves struggling with doubt about God and God’s Word. Something may happen leading us to question what we believe. We may find ourselves in a crisis over the fear of losing our faith. Like the other seasons of darkness, God has gifts for those who go through a season of doubt or deconstruction. For example, such gifts include a deeper relationship with God and a better understanding of God’s Word.
 
There are many reasons one may be in the darkness of doubting and deconstructing their faith
            God is constant, faithful, true, and always present. Despite this truth, in a season of darkness, we can experience feelings of being disconnected from God. God and faith in God can feel distant, irrelevant, and without substance. This season of darkness can be short or long. It may be doubts around a smaller aspect of one’s faith, like a doctrine or a spiritual truth. It may encompass deconstruction of one’s faith. The darkness of doubt and deconstruction can be painful and unsettling. It can hurt and feel scary to question what we once held as certain and true.
            There are many paths to the darkness of doubt and deconstruction, but like the other seasons of darkness, there are also gifts that God has for those who are walking with God in faith.      
            For some, doubt or deconstruction is an intellectual, philosophical, ethical, or moral disconnect. We may find it hard to reconcile such viewpoints with what we have been taught from a faith perspective. For example, science or our own experiences in the world can bring a lack of harmony. Sometimes, we have experienced scandal or hypocrisy from fellow believers or spiritual leaders.  This experience can leave us reeling with disillusionment and a sense of betrayal or mistrust which can rock our faith footing.
            Others may have experienced personal suffering, trauma, or unanswered prayer that hurts deeply and causes us to question: What do we believe about God? Can God be trusted? Is there even a God at all?
            We may be thrust into doubt and deconstruction after witnessing or experiencing things said and done in the name of God around injustice, hate, or the lack of compassion for human dignity. Doubt and deconstruction can also result when one who calls themselves a brother of sister in the faith is silent in complicity with such things. We question whether we can still be part of a faith that would allow such things.
            We may find ourselves in the darkness of doubt and deconstruction because we live in a mobile world of globalization, immigration, and international travel. We have become exposed to other worldviews and religious traditions that have raised questions about our own faith traditions and practices. This can be particularly difficult when we meet people who appear to be just as devout as we are.    

Doubt is a gift, not a sin; the opposite of faith is unbelief
            Doubt is often viewed as negative, a thing to be avoided or suppressed. Doubt is not sin. We all have doubt from time to time.
            There is much about things we have faith in that we cannot prove. If these things are completely certain and provable, we would not need faith.
             “And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him” (Hebrews 11:6). “Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, ‘I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!’” (Mark 9:24). The opposite of faith is not doubt. Rather, the opposite of faith is unbelief. You can have doubts and still have faith. The boy’s father prayed for help with unbelief.
            In many ways, doubt itself is God’s gift to us in the darkness of doubt. Doubt is an invitation. Doubt challenges us to move beyond the superficial. Doubt encourages us to take a second look, to investigate a bit more. Doubt engages the mind, heart, and spirit in a deeper exploration of God.
           
Our faith journey is vibrant, not meant to be static; doubt is part of growing  
            We are to be growing, maturing, and flourishing. This happens as God expands our understanding, revealing more of God and God’s mysteries. We grow deeper in God’s Word and learn through our experiences. As God expands our understanding, it can be scary at first; our minds are renewed and opened to new possibilities. Then we have new ways of thinking, and new questions arise.
            The same growth process is true as we learn new things about the world. For example, science can cause us to go back and say I’m not so sure of what I used to believe. It can be scary to expand, grow, and open our minds, looking again at nuggets of truth in God’s Word. Our understanding of the truth in God’s Word may need to grow. That truth may conflict with what we used to believe.
            What if doubt is a gift God uses to move us forward and deepen our faith? Doubt is essentially a growing pain. If we suppress it, deny it, and refuse to look at our doubts, then we are stifling our growth. One writer said that doubt is the ants in the pants of faith. Let’s view this video, “Keeping Faith Awake.” https://drive.google.com/file/d/12Rl5lyf_Uyc9f98mReaVP1k9nyuMemmG/view

Doubts can be good, with potential to be a refining fire to take you deeper on your journey with God
            Doubts can help us purify what we believe and why. When someone is experiencing doubt, or reevaluating what they believe, it is not enough to simply say, “have faith and it will all be okay.” God has given us our brain with the capacity to reason, make connections, and make deductions. God is open to our questions, even though we may not always like God’s answers. God does not shut down our brain.
            Being honest to allow yourself to ask tough questions takes courage. Any doubt we may have is a doubt that God has dealt with before. In our doubts, God invites you and God to do this together. With God, let’s go back to God’s Word and dig deeper. Share what you are questioning with another believer who will listen to you, walk with you, and perhaps share how the other believer wrestled with this same area of doubt. God says, “Let Me use your doubts to take you deeper on your journey with Me.”          
 
Gifts in the darkness of doubt
            Doubt can stretch us to move beyond superficial faith. Doubt can cultivate a deeper relationship with God. Doubt can humble us, reminding us of our limited understanding. Doubt can help us grow in patience with others who are on their own faith journey.
            If you are experiencing doubt now, keep asking the hard questions. You may not get the answer right now; you may never get the answers. To keep asking keeps your posture of faith in God. Asking helps you grow in the truth, peace, and humility. Asking question is okay. You don’t need to have all the answers.
            Most of the time, we come to terms with our doubts. Even when the doubts are not fully resolved, God provides grace to be at peace with what we cannot answer, and our faith continues.
            Jesus says that we only need faith the size of a mustard seed. A mustard seed is a small amount of faith. God really is the one who does the heavy lifting. We just need a heart turned toward God, even in our doubts. Like the father of the boy in Mark 9:24, we can say, “God, I believe. Help me in my unbelief.” God is faithful to meet us right there.
            There may be times when doubt continues to plague us and grow larger. We cannot come to terms with what we are seeing, sensing, or feeling. The disconnection, interior tension, and pains are too great. In those seasons, we move into the darkness of deconstruction.

The darkness of deconstruction is dismantling of what we have believed
            The term deconstruction has become popular in our culture. You may have heard celebrities or popular personalities talking about deconstructing their faith. Gospel rap artist Lecrae wrote a song titled Deconstruction describing the pain of his experiences in White Evangelical Christianity, which turned him away from God for a season.
            In today’s culture, the term deconstruction has become a catch all term for all of the following: (1) a complete demolitions of Christian beliefs, (2) a critical reappraisal of one’s faith tradition, (3) an honest acknowledgment of doubt and questions. But let’s define deconstruction as the deeper crises beyond doubt.
            Brian Zahnd, in his book, When Everything Catches Fire, defines deconstruction: “A crisis of faith that leads to either a reevaluation of Christianity or sometimes a total abandonment of Christianity.” Deconstruction is a critical juncture in one’s faith journey and a space of deep darkness.

Not everyone who deconstructs also converts away from Christianity
            God’s provides gifts in deconstruction. God can use the darkness of deconstruction to lead us to a deeper relationship with God and a better understanding of God’s Word.
            Deconstruction does not have to be negative. One gift from God in deconstruction is to make it a process for reconstruction.
            For example, some members of South Bay Community Church had to go through reconstruction around women in church leadership. This still continues to be a divisive topic in the Church. There are people who are no longer here because they do not agree with our biblical interpretation of women in leadership. We agree to disagree and still love one another.
            Just as we go to God in faith with our doubts, one of the gifts in deconstruction is to go to God with a fresh set of blueprints. When we are in a deconstruction season, it requires an open mind to a possible new way of thinking. In deconstruction, we are essentially starting over from the ground up. On the idea of a woman leader, the church elders took the church through a deconstruction process of going back to God’s Word with an open mind and an open heart. We examined God’s Word in its cultural and historical context.    
Before God, we considered the arguments around women in leadership. We listened for the Holy Spirit’s guidance. Some, who started with a different view, did the work of deconstruction and changed their views.
 
Deconstruction is a process of critically examining and questioning our beliefs and doctrines
            Deconstruction reevaluates what we have been taught. We seek a more authentic understanding of our faith according to God’s Word. The journey through deconstruction can be unsettling and uncertain. We may not end up where we thought we would end, and it is hard work. Some are not willing to do the work and they walk away, or they conclude that this faith is not for them. Those who work through the darkness of deconstruction in faith can embrace the gifts God has for them.
           
Gifts in the darkness of deconstruction that make the process to be reconstruction
            One gift in the darkness of deconstruction is the gift of personal conviction. Because you did the work of the process of deconstruction, you know what you believe and why.
            Another gift in the darkness of deconstruction is the gift of a deeper understanding and closer relationship with God. You have wrestled, studied, and toiled with God.
            Another gift in the darkness of deconstruction is the gift of renewed and resilient faith. The gift has integrated faith and reason to where God has you today.

Final stanzas of Lacrae’s song, “Deconstruction”
            “Tears streaming as I weep, I felt I heard the Lord speak. I've been running from you but you never ran away from me. It was people that hurt me, it wasn't God, though. I let the church trauma turn into a God wound. I learned the western world has twisted up the scriptures. So when I re-enlisted, I learned the eastern context, the way that Jesus meant it. My peace has been cemented; my soul has been re-lifted.
My deconstruction ended, reconstruction is beginning” (repeat).

Application on what we can do
            There are gifts in the darkness of doubt and deconstruction that deepen our love relationship with God for a truer, vibrant, more authentic, and more meaningful relationship.
            If you are in a dark season of doubt or deconstruction, struggling with your faith and what you believe, “keep on keeping on.” Even with your uncertainties, be honest with God and hold on. God will meet you where you are, even if all you have now is a small seed of faith. Allow God to be faithful, as you are honest about your doubts. As you do the work of deconstructing your faith to reconstruct a more authentic and vibrant faith, receive and embrace the gifts of this darkness. Relationship with God is worth it, and God will stay by your side.
            Perhaps this message is not so much for you, but for someone you know. Perhaps a young adult child or friend has expressed doubts, is in the process of deconstructing, or even has now walked away from the faith. Here are three things to do besides the obvious of praying and asking the help of the Holy Spirit: (1) Create safe places where people feel they can truly share their doubts. It is hard to admit doubts, but if we create safe spaces, we will learn that others have doubts also. (2) It is our job to be a companion walking with them on their spiritual journey, not our job to fix all doubts or have all the answers. This is particularly true for adult children as we feel pain to watch children go in a direction that feels away from the faith. Walk together and create that safe space for true sharing. (3) Learn to listen really well. Listen to the concerns under the doubts expressed or the concerns that lead to deconstruction.
                       

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS INCLUDING FOR USE IN FAMILY GROUP

There are many reasons one may be in the darkness of doubt and deconstructing their faith
-In what ways have you experienced a season of doubt or deconstructing your faith?
-What experience, if any, did you have that thrust you into doubt or deconstructing your faith?
-What were your feelings when you went through the process of doubt or deconstructing your faith?

Doubt is a gift, not a sin; the opposite of faith is unbelief
-What are some positive results from having doubt?
-In what ways can honest doubt result in a process that is a gift from God?

Our faith journey is vibrant, not meant to be static; doubt is part of growing
-Why is doubt that leads to new questions and new ways of thinking essential for growth?
-When doubt raises new questions, why is it important to look again at understanding the truth in God’s Word?
-What is your reaction to the video, “Keeping Faith Awake”?

Doubts can be good, with potential to be a refining fire to take you deeper on your journey with God
-In what ways can you join together with God in the season of doubt as God takes you deeper on your journey with God?

Gifts in the darkness of doubt
-How can doubt stretch us to move beyond a superficial faith to a deeper relationship with God, even if with doubts our personalized faith as an individual is small?

The darkness of deconstruction is dismantling of what we have believed
-How does Brian Zahnd define deconstruction differently than the honesty of doubt?
-In what times in your journey have doubts created disconnection, interior tension, and pain so great, that you enter the darkness of deconstruction, the dismantling of what you have believed?

Not everyone who deconstructs also converts away from Christianity
-Why does deconstruction, defined as the reevaluation or even the abandonment of Christianity, not always result in conversion away from Christian faith?

Deconstruction is a process of critically examining and questioning our beliefs and doctrines
-Why is the journey through deconstruction often unsettling and uncertain?

Gifts in the darkness of deconstruction that make the process to be reconstruction
-What gifts are available in the process of deconstruction to make it a process of reconstruction?

Final stanzas of Lacrae’s song, “Deconstruction”
-From Lacrae’s song, “Deconstruction,” what resonates with you?

Application on what we can do
-What has been your experience in relying on God during your seasons of honest doubt or reconstructing your faith?
-When someone you know has honest doubts or is in the process of deconstruction, what are three things besides prayer that you can do? Why?
-Why is it important to have faith for others who are going through doubt and deconstruction?

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