Courageous Conversations: Love Comes First (Lite)

July 27th, 2022
by Tony DeGruy

Opening Prayer & Check-in
Listen Up: If Not For Your Grace
Scripture Texts: Luke 19;1-7; Mark 2:13-17

Sermon Preamble: Pastor Tammy opened by picking up on the refrain from the song “If Not For Your Grace” (and I encourage you/your Small Group to do the same, in fact, listen to the song linked above) and highlighted four (4) critical accomplishments of God’s grace; it restores, it redeems, it releases us to worship, and it repairs. She noted that as we broach this complex topic, we must do so with humility, empathy, mercy, and, yes, grace. She also stated that while we may not all agree, our response must be rooted in love. Pastor Tammy noted that when it comes to the LGTBQIA+ community, applying God’s grace is vital in our and the Big C church’s response. At the core of these issues are people who are made in His image, and the brokenness, hurt, resentment, and estrangement that have been experienced are contrary to God’s desires for His creation.

Love Comes First: Let’s Look at the Scriptures

Luke 19:1-7
- Jesus knew that He would encounter Zacchaeus…
Mark 2:13-17
- Jesus was unquestionably committed to bringing people together who otherwise would want nothing to do with each other. His ministry was defined by His relentless pursuit of those His culture called unclean and unwanted. Jesus was so radical in His efforts to bring people together that He was often accused of compromising holiness and being complicit with sin. But none of that got in the way of Jesus’ mission: bringing all of humanity back into right relationship with their heavenly Father

Commonalities

Jesus was always about His mission
There were always onlookers who opposed Jesus’ embracing those society deemed beneath who they thought He should be engaging; sinners were to be shunned, they needed to somehow “get right” or “clean themselves up” before being welcomed in His presence
They Are Us, We Are Them
- Jesus’ initial audience of religious leaders missed the radical, otherworldly love that Jesus was modeling
- We, as members of the Big C church, are missing it, too, before any of the other aspects of a relationship with Christ, Love. Must. Be. First.
- We must know what we believe and why we believe so that we do not drift
- We must not wait until this issue becomes personal before we address it

Love Comes First: Human Sexuality

The Church has not demonstrated Christlike love towards members of the LGBTQIA+ community
Our overall, non-empathetic response has inflicted pain, hurt, guilt, and shame upon them
Their response to our rejection, our wounding, has caused them to withdraw, hide, and worse
It has been espoused from some pulpits that the Bible teaches that members of this community should be “shot in the back of the head and killed”. There is no Bible for this!
The Big C church is at a crossroads as our culture is in a fast-moving sexual revolution that demands a response

Love Comes First: Let’s Look at the Data

Americans on Same-Sex Marriage
- 2004: 60% oppose, 31% support
- 2019: 61% support, 31% oppose
Support for same-sex marriage is up across all religions, racial, and generational lines

Love Comes First: The Conversation is Nuanced

It goes beyond gay and lesbian
Bi-sexual, queer, questioning, asexual, pansexual
Some see it as a justice issue as sexuality is a primary way of understanding ourselves and for some, expressing themselves and acceptance is critical

Love Comes First: Understanding the Terms

Same-Sex Relationship Affirming
- The view that God affirms same-sex relationships and that they are not a sin
Same-Sex Relationship Non-Affirming
- The view that God does not affirm same-sex relationships, believing sexual intimacy is a precious gift that God designed for a heterosexual marital relationship
SBCC falls into this latter category
The biblical texts are explicit; Leviticus 18:22, 20:13, and Genesis 19:5
Depending on where you stand on affirming same-sex relationships, you could interpret scriptures such as 1 Cor 6:9-10, Romans 1:26-27, and 1 Tim 1:9-10 totally different yet, we all espouse love of God
We must therefore seek God’s face as we wrestle with our individual and collective responses

Love Comes First: The Videos

Conversation I

What did you hear
What came to your mind
What is stirring

Conversation II

What did you hear
What came to your mind
What does being a safe church for all people mean to you

Conversation III

What did you hear
What came to your mind
What does it mean that we might “see the other as wrong” but still see them “as human”

Conversation IV

What did you hear
What came to your mind
Why is embracing with love critical before we talk about Jesus

Conversation V

What did you hear
What came to your mind
What does ”we receive you” mean or suggest to you

Conversation VI

What did you hear
What came to your mind
What impact does unconditional love and acceptance have on the life of someone who is a member of the LGBTQIA+ community

Link to The Center for Faith, Sexuality, & Gender (https://www.centerforfaith.com/) and their Small Group Content (https://store.centerforfaith.com/cgi-bin/frontrunner.cgi?ri=203&rc=CENF&rs=T&ro=T&fnm=sgleaderskit&cfg=1&ssid=CENFDSmznEWhZ_95&ctc=4)

Love Comes First: Revisiting the Scriptures

Luke 19:1-7
- This was not a chance encounter
- Jesus came by, and He looked up and called Zacchaeus by name
- Jesus declared that He must be a guest at Zacchaeus’ home, which meant friendship and fellowship
- Zacchaeus was filled with excitement and joy because of Jesus’ grace and mercy

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
Head

What impact does the fact that, like Zaccheaus, there are no “chance encounters” which we have had with Jesus have on your life?
Before this message, through what lens have you examined the topic of Human Sexuality? After having watched, listened to, and discussed this message, has anything changed for you? If so, what?
What do you see as your role in helping bridge the gap personally, as a member of SBCC and the Big C church when it comes to addressing the LGBTQIA+ community?
How can we engage with those whose sexual orientation and lifestyles differ from ours while honoring their humanity and being made in the image of God?
Does our silence on pre-marital and adulterous relationships scream duplicity in the face of those who practice and support same-sex relationships?

Heart

How would God have us engage in conversation on these matters with our family, friends, neighbors, and coworkers, especially those whose opinions and beliefs differ from ours? How do we do this and represent God and His love around these issues?
Where would you be if you would have had to clean yourself up before coming to Jesus? Now, imagine how those who are struggling with their sexuality must feel when they are shunned and expelled from the church, their families, and society. Does this break your heart as it does their and our Creator’s heart?
Look inside your heart, if you have intentionally or unintentionally harmed someone in the LGTBQIA+ community, what is God leading you to do, and will you do it?
How would someone you love, especially your child, grandchild, or sibling, “coming out” impact your relationship with them? With Christ?

Hands

Look at the videos again as you pray through what your response should be. If you are so led, reach out across differences and engage with someone whose opinion of this matter differs and without judgment, have a courageous conversation.

YOUTH & YOUNG ADULT
Head

What impact does the fact that, like Zaccheaus, there are no “chance encounters” which we have had with Jesus have on your life?
Before this message, through what lens have you examined the topic of Human Sexuality? After having watched, listened to, and discussed this message, has anything changed for you? If so, what?
What do you see as your role in helping bridge the gap personally, as a member of SBCC and the Big C church when it comes to addressing the LGBTQIA+ community?
How can we engage with those whose sexual orientation and lifestyles differ from ours while honoring their humanity and being made in the image of God?
Does our silence on pre-marital and adulterous relationships scream duplicity in the face of those who practice and support same-sex relationships?

Heart

How would God have us engage in conversation on these matters with our family, friends, neighbors, and coworkers, especially those whose opinions and beliefs differ from ours? How do we do this and represent God and His love around these issues?
Where would you be if you would have had to clean yourself up before coming to Jesus? Now, imagine how those who are struggling with their sexuality must feel when they are shunned and expelled from the church, their families, and society. Does this break your heart as it does their and our Creator’s heart?
Look inside your heart, if you have intentionally or unintentionally harmed someone in the LGTBQIA+ community, what is God leading you to do, and will you do it?
How would someone you love, especially your child, grandchild, or sibling, “coming out” impact your relationship with them? With Christ?

Hands

Look at the videos again as you pray through what your response should be. If you are so led, reach out across differences and engage with someone whose opinion of this matter differs and without judgment, have a courageous conversation.

CHILDREN
Head

Parents, this is a very sensitive topic, so we encourage you to consider your child’s readiness for this conversation and to use the above material as you see fit

Heart

Share with your child that all of our encounters with Him are not by chance and the root of them is love which serves as a model for how we are to engage people

Hands

As a family, reach across to someone of difference and show them the radical love of Jesus as a means of demonstrating His seeing them and wanting to have a relationship with them

Posted in Courageous Conversations